As all well educated men know, the taller you are the better the air is that you breathe. To try and tip the scales back in the direction of the short folk, I offer two weekend solutions:
1) Go see UP. It opens today and from what I can tell of the trailers, it should remind us all that there is a world of amazing-ness (it's my blog and I'll create words if I want to!) just beyond the extent of our imagination. And since it is about a crotchety old man - I am expecting several "angry fist in the air moments" - who takes off into the great air beyond, perhaps it will offer some suggestions on how to get that "better air" my tall brethren and I are suckin in. Even if it just means that all the short people need to get in a hot air balloon and fly away. Not that that's what I am suggesting...
2) Attend Earthfest 2009. Instead of complaining that all the tall folks are getting the better air, how about we all get together, listen to some 90's rock, score some free Whole Foods goodies and - oh yea - learn about how we can save Mother Earth. We could actually make ALL the air better, not just the air Shaq and I are breathing. I plan on attending but that's only bc I am a sucker for boys in flannel shirts. Obviously, I am all set with the good air.
Happy weekend folks!
Friday, May 29, 2009
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Taxation Without Representation
It is alas only my third blog post and I am (was) a little stumped on what to write. Last night's smashing dinner at Vinoteca de Monica's in the North End certainly deserves a mention as does today's delightfully kitch (kitsch?) lunch at the new Friendly Toast in Kendall Sq. Yes, dammit, I am a foodie and there will be blog posts a'plenty about those topics. In the meantime, go eat and those places and tell em' LHV sent you. I've got some tax issues to work out.
I was just recently made aware (thanks KFritzy!) of a rather delightful piece of academic research. Seems that Greg Mankiw, a professor of economics at Harvard University, wrote this satirical paper entitled The Optimal Taxation of Height: A Case Study of Utilitarian Income Redistribution. which states (tounge in cheek, obvi) that those of a higher stature should be charged higher taxes. And since I am not an economist, I cannot tell you what the political/economic/funny things that only rich smart people understand reasoning would be for making this argument. The part that I find most hysterical is that this paper, when written in 2007, actually gathered support in the government! Two guesses, a sassy pair of eyeglasses and a moose to those who can guess which state is in support: See below for the remarks made from Alaska's Stories In The News.
Rep. Mike Doogan, D-Anchorage, hailed the report as groundbreaking and sent two letters to the governor, one to the House Speaker, a postcard to the president, and a singing telegram to the Bundestag urging them to immediately adopt the tallness tax.
Rep. Doogan continued by saying
"I've said it time and time again," Doogan said. "The big and powerful always prosper at the expense of short people." Doogan reports his height at 5' 11", but medical records list it closer to 5' 8". "It's time tall people start carrying their own weight. I'd also like to see legislation to limit the amount of higher altitude air they breathe. By the time the air gets down to us, most of the good stuff has already been all breathed up."
Can you say amazing?? I dont even really have any comments on this because - really? REALLY? - it's just that crazy. I just think it is hysterical. This is the most random tall factoid I have ever come across and clearly, it's made my evening. Singing telegrams, rich people, a lack of oxygen?! Kudos Alaska.
I was just recently made aware (thanks KFritzy!) of a rather delightful piece of academic research. Seems that Greg Mankiw, a professor of economics at Harvard University, wrote this satirical paper entitled The Optimal Taxation of Height: A Case Study of Utilitarian Income Redistribution. which states (tounge in cheek, obvi) that those of a higher stature should be charged higher taxes. And since I am not an economist, I cannot tell you what the political/economic/funny things that only rich smart people understand reasoning would be for making this argument. The part that I find most hysterical is that this paper, when written in 2007, actually gathered support in the government! Two guesses, a sassy pair of eyeglasses and a moose to those who can guess which state is in support: See below for the remarks made from Alaska's Stories In The News.
Rep. Mike Doogan, D-Anchorage, hailed the report as groundbreaking and sent two letters to the governor, one to the House Speaker, a postcard to the president, and a singing telegram to the Bundestag urging them to immediately adopt the tallness tax.
Rep. Doogan continued by saying
"I've said it time and time again," Doogan said. "The big and powerful always prosper at the expense of short people." Doogan reports his height at 5' 11", but medical records list it closer to 5' 8". "It's time tall people start carrying their own weight. I'd also like to see legislation to limit the amount of higher altitude air they breathe. By the time the air gets down to us, most of the good stuff has already been all breathed up."
Can you say amazing?? I dont even really have any comments on this because - really? REALLY? - it's just that crazy. I just think it is hysterical. This is the most random tall factoid I have ever come across and clearly, it's made my evening. Singing telegrams, rich people, a lack of oxygen?! Kudos Alaska.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
What's Wrong With This Picture?
As a tall single gal roaming the streets of Boston, there are many alarming sights. The sketchy guy eying your purse on the Orange Line. The sleazy bartender eying your - whatever - on a Saturday night at Felt. But none strikes fear in the heart of the Tall Gal more than...DUN DUN DUN...the tall guy dating the short girl.
It's unfair from the start. I mean, how many guys over 6ft are there even in this town? And then to see one of our few potential soulmates matched up with a midget, ahem, a lady of petite height....it's enough to start a fire of rage inside you that has no equal. Usually I will be the first to condemn this pairing and point out how akward it must be when he has to bend in half to kiss her goodnight. But occassionaly (the exeption makes the rule, right?), there is a TG/SG pair that makes it ok. For me, that pair is Jen and Jason Newberg.
Jason is an old colleague of mine and stands proudly at 6'5" tall. His charming wife is all of 5'2" - and don't let her fool ya, that's on a good high heeled day. They were married in a custom-made chuppah (to be high enough for him) and the majority of their wedding photos involve at least one member of the newleyweds engaged in something to reduce their height (sitting on a bench, kneeling on the ground, lounging on a grassy knoll). And yet when in their presence...it just doesn't matter. You can't help but feel the love between them and know that sometimes, height knows no limits.
So for you, Jason & Jen, I will put aside my predjudice's towards to TG/SG pairings...but only until I spot the man of MY dreams hanging with a short gal. Then it's anybody's game.
It's unfair from the start. I mean, how many guys over 6ft are there even in this town? And then to see one of our few potential soulmates matched up with a midget, ahem, a lady of petite height....it's enough to start a fire of rage inside you that has no equal. Usually I will be the first to condemn this pairing and point out how akward it must be when he has to bend in half to kiss her goodnight. But occassionaly (the exeption makes the rule, right?), there is a TG/SG pair that makes it ok. For me, that pair is Jen and Jason Newberg.
Jason is an old colleague of mine and stands proudly at 6'5" tall. His charming wife is all of 5'2" - and don't let her fool ya, that's on a good high heeled day. They were married in a custom-made chuppah (to be high enough for him) and the majority of their wedding photos involve at least one member of the newleyweds engaged in something to reduce their height (sitting on a bench, kneeling on the ground, lounging on a grassy knoll). And yet when in their presence...it just doesn't matter. You can't help but feel the love between them and know that sometimes, height knows no limits.
So for you, Jason & Jen, I will put aside my predjudice's towards to TG/SG pairings...but only until I spot the man of MY dreams hanging with a short gal. Then it's anybody's game.
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
I'm Taller Than You
When I was in the 8th grade (read: 12 years old), I wore a button. The button contained a simple phrase that answered a common question, asked of me almost every single day. The question: How tall ARE you?? To which the button would reply: I'm 5'11"
In the 18 years since I sported my button, I haven't grown in height all that much and now stand proudly at 6'1" tall. Yet I still get asked that question almost every day and so when my good friend Nikki pestered, er I mean, encouraged me to start my own blog (read hers, its hysterical) I kept thinking about what my vantage point would be. What small but significant view of the world could I have to offer? Well, here it is folks: I'm taller than you. And you wouldn't think that affects life every day but, oh does it. And I'm here to prove it! Sure, there are plenty of other folks out there writing about being tall but since I couldn't find any other city-livin loving, mad about movies, foodie fanatical, cat adoring tall gal blog, I figured my niche was set.
And to kick it off, I wrote a letter to the editor of Boston Magazine last week regarding an article in last month's issue entitled What Turns Us On: A User's Guide To Love and Lust in the Hub. So check out my letter below (bc I'm sure it isnt getting published in the pages of their mag, ha!) and stay tuned for my views from above. Above what? At the very least, the top of most bathroom stall walls (more on that later).
Dear Boston Magazine Editor -
I was prompted to write this letter by the article "What Turns Us On" in your most recent issue and, more specifically, by this startling statistic:
Survey says: The ideal Boston woman is about average height (5'4"–5'8"). But fewer than one in six Bostonians found women of 5'8" to 6'—a.k.a. the supermodel median—compellingly attractive.
No, its not the results of the survey that I take issue with (more on that later) but rather your survey requirements. How is it possible that you've completely neglected a large portion of the Boston metro population: the tall girl? Yes, I'm referring to the bevy of beautiful babies who so contribute to the physical landscape of this great city. The gals who top 6ft tall, a group of which I am a proud participant. As I stand here, in all my 6ft 1in glory, how is it that I don't even rank to be included as an option in the survey? Though I suppose that based on your results we should be pleased, given that the men of this town are less inclined to throw sidelong glances in our direction. Speaking for the glamazonian ladies I represent, we say: we're OK with that. According to the National Center for Health Statistics, the average height for an adult male in the United States is 5ft 9in. ( National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey (NHANES) conducted from 1999-2002.) Therefore, your average respondent was shorter than me and, as those who've dated us long-legged lasses in the past will attest, we like to be able to wear heels too. Simply speaking, we want a tall man for our very own. As a whole, I've found Boston to be a city somewhat on the shorter side (take a look at our mayor and governor! Aside from the Celtics, our popular landscape is not exactly banging their head on the door frame) and so to that we say, survey be dammed. I know those tall fellers are out there and I have faith that they'll come looking for my friends and I, regardless of your survey results.
Because that old amusement park guideline - You must be this tall to ride this ride - is one we're particularly fond of. So we'll keep wearing our 3in Manolos and smile politely when people ask if we played basketball in college because we know one thing's for sure: tall is terrific.
Cheers from the treetops,
Laura H. Vogel
In the 18 years since I sported my button, I haven't grown in height all that much and now stand proudly at 6'1" tall. Yet I still get asked that question almost every day and so when my good friend Nikki pestered, er I mean, encouraged me to start my own blog (read hers, its hysterical) I kept thinking about what my vantage point would be. What small but significant view of the world could I have to offer? Well, here it is folks: I'm taller than you. And you wouldn't think that affects life every day but, oh does it. And I'm here to prove it! Sure, there are plenty of other folks out there writing about being tall but since I couldn't find any other city-livin loving, mad about movies, foodie fanatical, cat adoring tall gal blog, I figured my niche was set.
And to kick it off, I wrote a letter to the editor of Boston Magazine last week regarding an article in last month's issue entitled What Turns Us On: A User's Guide To Love and Lust in the Hub. So check out my letter below (bc I'm sure it isnt getting published in the pages of their mag, ha!) and stay tuned for my views from above. Above what? At the very least, the top of most bathroom stall walls (more on that later).
Dear Boston Magazine Editor -
I was prompted to write this letter by the article "What Turns Us On" in your most recent issue and, more specifically, by this startling statistic:
Survey says: The ideal Boston woman is about average height (5'4"–5'8"). But fewer than one in six Bostonians found women of 5'8" to 6'—a.k.a. the supermodel median—compellingly attractive.
No, its not the results of the survey that I take issue with (more on that later) but rather your survey requirements. How is it possible that you've completely neglected a large portion of the Boston metro population: the tall girl? Yes, I'm referring to the bevy of beautiful babies who so contribute to the physical landscape of this great city. The gals who top 6ft tall, a group of which I am a proud participant. As I stand here, in all my 6ft 1in glory, how is it that I don't even rank to be included as an option in the survey? Though I suppose that based on your results we should be pleased, given that the men of this town are less inclined to throw sidelong glances in our direction. Speaking for the glamazonian ladies I represent, we say: we're OK with that. According to the National Center for Health Statistics, the average height for an adult male in the United States is 5ft 9in. ( National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey (NHANES) conducted from 1999-2002.) Therefore, your average respondent was shorter than me and, as those who've dated us long-legged lasses in the past will attest, we like to be able to wear heels too. Simply speaking, we want a tall man for our very own. As a whole, I've found Boston to be a city somewhat on the shorter side (take a look at our mayor and governor! Aside from the Celtics, our popular landscape is not exactly banging their head on the door frame) and so to that we say, survey be dammed. I know those tall fellers are out there and I have faith that they'll come looking for my friends and I, regardless of your survey results.
Because that old amusement park guideline - You must be this tall to ride this ride - is one we're particularly fond of. So we'll keep wearing our 3in Manolos and smile politely when people ask if we played basketball in college because we know one thing's for sure: tall is terrific.
Cheers from the treetops,
Laura H. Vogel
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